Jose Padua: That Certain Kind of Light

Vox Populi

In high school it was the son
of a congressman from Texas
who seemed to have the most
fun ridiculing my Tourette’s
tics. I’d shrug my shoulders,
blink my eyes, and suddenly
tilt my head as if I were
emptying out the fluid;
it must have looked ridiculous.
He talked fast, did magic
tricks, and was so confident
he never had to watch his back,
never had to do anything other
than sit back, stand up, or laugh,
and he was so much cooler
than I could ever hope to be.
There were days then when
I felt so small I almost felt
I wasn’t even there, which
made it easier when people
were laughing at me and I
felt as if I were watching it
rather than living it and from
a safe, almost silent distance.
And this is why I can never go
back to feeling so small…

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3 responses to “Jose Padua: That Certain Kind of Light

  1. taking ourselves out of the reality of this kind of bullying allows us to survive and you are right, we can find great strength in knowing we never have to go back…well-said

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