Traitorous Slime and the Muse

Open link set

The broadening of possibility

Does it match reality?

We don’t care.

We go on.

We go on.

 

We know we are getting somewhere

We know what it looks like

We don’t know where it is yet

But we will arrive

 

You tell me you should already know

I would have known

No one ever told me

Could have saved me a lot of time and pain

 

Beware the sketchies

They cannot be trusted

Beware the regular folk

They are deceitful and traitorous

 

Word

The quest for power

The flight from the dark

If you have not been in the dark

Do you really know what light is?

 

The trickster

The betrayer

Kill the sick

Make more sick

We don’t want them to be happy or to heal

Our minds are set

They are wrong

Because they’re broken

They are broken

Because they are a wrong

 

You have no truth

You have no light

You have no compass

You have no ethics

Your behavior is inconsistent

 

My work is not luminous

I have things to say

I just need to stop playing this fucking video game

And get some goddamn deprenyl

 

Whatever.

Random Crap

Random Crap

Running Out Of Batteries

Instumentals On The Internet Radio

Up Too Late

Too Much Beer For Health

But It Is Good

I Can Haz Plan??

Mai, Oui.

A miscegenation

A beautiful thought in sci fi u/dys to pia

a star

a strag

a strane

s as a

a strange miscegenation

of peppermint and spearmint in the graden garden

a splinter in time of descriptive valout

but how could it be a hybrid in the tragedy of the pollutants and radiosacktivs

methp

method

Deknet a gain

a collection of nonsense hatch phrases

catc

sticking to my brain resolutely demanding to get out without exp palnan

ations nations

or context

Deknent

Method arc method time

shockdrops neologisms without meaning

except to me

there used to be more

oh well

I’m sure they’ll come back to annoy me again soon

flat gestures plans

heroism works

against entropy of ordinary human reality

unpracticed and unrefined

yet momentarily satisfied

I type

mysterymint

Eliyahu

Words rose on the water and took flight under their own power

Man was created

And woman

The land was fresh and new

A sparrow sang out

The sun glistened down in crystal shards

Stirring that feeling of dark watery magic

Elusive hope drifiting in

For a moment

Built with stone it did not flee

It stayed and grew, a muddy pool

Seeded with teeming life

Silver threads of silent sprouts rose to the sky

Twining about the bushes

From their buds came silver insects

Who turned green on their second day

Then grew golden lines

They developed muscles and wandered the air and the earth

They made love to the flowers of their mother and all her terrestrial sisters

Spreading over the barren, still terrain

The seeds of life

It was a good day

Coalescing into a pulsing orb of fire

They exploded with implausible rapidity

Over the land at the speed of light

Their web of light crystallized, suddenly wrapping the earth

Now an electromagnet, larger than life

The geometry of the minerals and the creatures shifted under its influence

Becoming sculpted talismans

Living and breathing

Transforming energy into flying packets

The exchange proliferated without direction

Timeless

Endless

Creative in its emergent chaos

New forms roiled and contested

Gradually shifting into sensual symbiosis with one another

Deliciously caressing one another’s lines of power and motion

Smooth flow was ascendant

Sex and Children

I once knew someone who told me how she had, when she was 7, taught her 5 year old sister to masturbate.  She had learned it herself.  She confided that she was worried she might have screwed the younger girl up.  I didn’t see anything wrong with it, though, and I think I said so.  After all, infants do a bit of that without instruction from anyone, at least if they aren’t interfered with.  The Hysteria about children and sex hadn’t yet made any impression on me (19 years old, in 2004).  A year or so later, I was at gathering of mostly older people, with some other young people (I was the son of the organizer, and my sister had some friends there).  I was nineteen, and there was a young girl and a young boy there (children of other attendees.  I invited the girl to sit with us at one point, cuz I thought she might be bored with all the old people, and she refused, and then my (3 years older) sister told me “Stop, she’ll think you’re hitting on her”  (the girl was like thirteen or 11).  I remember this, its a flashbulb memory among a largely lost night, but I didn’t think anything of it.  Little did I know, the seeds of the Hysteria had been planted in my brain, and would grow, gradually making me feel another irrational paranoia on top of te one’s I already had, disconnected from all the realities of myself.  Why would someone say something like that?  I don’t know, but I have discovered, later that she holds a variety of other squirelly opinions about herself and various others, and social practices, which make no sense to me, and seem to be based on nothing and asserting all kinds of strange ideas filled with judgement.  None of this matches with what I thought I knew about her, but then I think hell, I didn’t know much of anything about her until I was 15 or so, and not much at all until I was 19.  How strange is that?  Life in the age of growing up with videogames, books, and TV as the primary vectors of reality, not counting the imprisonment at what we call school, while methodical conditioning and indoctrination is occurring.  I’m glad I’m growing up now to have a chance of freedom, but even more I wish I had been born later, when the internet was already an established reality, to bring me the news of what was possible faster and clearer.  On the other hand, a lot of people, even those who seem to be similar to me, also seem to be ignorant of a lot of the things I have learned, just by exploring the worded universe out there, but I guess I forgot for a long time, too, when I was too paranoid of the governement to use the internet or cell phones escept in cases of necessity.  But I’m older and stronger now, the ignorance can’t hurt me anymore, and neither can my own impulses which have been refined by the struggles.  Of course there is still pain, but at least I have a sense of where I’m going, where I could go, and where I’d like to go.

And check this out:

http://deoxy.org/gaia/kidslibnow.htm

Among other things…

Credit!

Credit, sweet credit!

Rescuing me finally from my own excesses!

Sweet Credit!

It may not be much, but it’s enough to get me through

First credit I ever did have, and its cheap!

10% up front, no more overdraft fees, ever again!

Credit I celebrate thee and sing thee!

Credit for me credit for all, if only!

Who will fund a microcredit program in Nashville?

Who will fund a Housing First program for the homeless?

Oh credit, I deserve you why did you withhold your tender touch so long?

As I wailed and drowned , not under my spending, but under my penalties…

Credit!

A revolution for me,

Together with sobriety,

Mostly

The Big Giant Lock

Junk Junk Junk

All I write is Junk

Fast Junk

Pretty Junk

Lazy Junk

Hazy Junk

Exclamations

Portable Expressions

Mist in the clouds

Fallen angels and delusions

Rolling Internet Memes and Perplexing Parity Paradoxes

Depression, Alienation Sickness, and Shock Drops

Dreams of anacondas and yellow poison dart snakes

Waterfalls

Lifting My weight slowly in the morning

Pen to paper or something

Noisy finance woes

bah humbug

Fixed!

A failure of memory nothing more

Books reading reading reading

Serial killers to Norwegian Black Metal Scene

Wikipedia Laughter yoga

been here a year and my first drop in visitors

Junk Junk Junk

Drunk Junk

Starting to clear it out junk

Witchcraft and salad a walk in the neighborhood shocking plumage

Sticking on the guns wavering

At odds with society in perpetua

yet polite and domesticated

Drug drugs drugs failures inadequate explanations filling the

holes with fantastic delusions and obsessive controlling divination

the nation

the war the war the war the war

Glenn Beck freeware linux revoltution

the library thing and winged dragons in the i ching

deoxyorg plumage smart drugs where have all my magic bullets gone

missed memories rebuilt lessons learned age

the destruction of alcohol the missing pot years no hard drug issues

just alcohol and pot

actually pot then alcohol

hard drugs were clear in their direction

faded

hard drugs misnomer miscalculation

stigma and prejudice lolling on the couch

the stupid unexamined assumptions

monogamous assumptions the wrecking ball of life

over needs no instruction on planar matters

the bereft social landscape saith the sage of deoxyorg do i know

i know i know all things i know all people i know you i know

me

you are fantastic ive lost confidence but its coming back

do you think you are you do you know where you are

don’t listen

fuck him that critic

pitic pickery picky pick pick pick away until its gone

no center never had one having to code from scratch issues the laughter

dwindling away

stopping halting ceasing as mysteriously as it came

the veil got thin towards the end of the weekend pluralities of voice splitting

non paranoia imaginary ghostage

serial killers living in the land

the bar owner, ??  no no just a strange humor

living on in futility lifted on the wedge of impossible unfitting expectation

legal dangers of the mission falling slowly

prey to war and torture paranoia the end gone below

living simply as nothing, no one, i do not exist anymore, political instaincts extinguished and destroyed in anomie

player

living growing understanding the power i now stand poised to grasp

but is it what i really want?  why not just pretty pictures

Junk Junk Junk

lift on the extreme

the extreme of plain boring me, no

awake

touch /

#!/bin/bash

Stillness

Calming states calming practices

The all seeing eye

Seek out the knowledge

It may destroy you, but it is your only hope

Live the dream

Love the life

Tangents whistle across these whispers

Candle flame

Where has it lost?

Pichromatic singing beauty

Voluminous knowledge

Locked away

Sitting on a kettle where the flame keeps dying…

Turn it higher, higher

The Tower Fell

The tower fell

Waiting in lines

Breathing in chaos

Looking for signs

.

The tower fell

Walking on sand dunes

Dreaming of roses

Seeing two moons

.

The tower fell

All plans disrupted

Fault lines uncovered

Soldiers abducted

.

The tower fell

The people forgotten

Living in wishes

The government rotten

.

The tower fell

The needle pushed

Rush of clean pleasure

The circle ambushed

.

And now once again

Here is the star

Here is the peace

Will you not join us?

Come back from afar

.

And now once again

He’s beating his wife

There is a solution

It cannot be used

Next time he gets life

.

And now once again

Drive to the mall

See the actors on TV

Dreaming of glamour

Will you hear the call?

.

And now once again

Casting those votes

There, it is written

There, on the wall

.

And put on those coats

And now once again

We’re going to school

The darkness is hidden

The joy is elusive

Now gather those tools

.

We gather those Lamas

And bankers of yore

To build something better

Weave webs of dreams

Strengthen the core

Merging

I come bearing Flame and Sword

Iron, steel glint

Making divisions and distinctions

I pour the subtle fire expanding into a sphere

I write the elegy of fallen empires and utopian dreams

These mundane things I imbue with force

I am the wind and the thunder in the night

Feminine, fierce, rejected, merging

These words I forge into webs

These webs I weave into birds

These birds I set forth into the world

This world I turn inside out

Bringing it closer to the other, coming alive myself